1) Qus. : What are you doing?
Ans. : Business.
Tax : PAY PROFESSIONAL TAX!

2) Qus. : What are you doing in Business?
Ans. : Selling the Goods.
Tax : PAY SALES TAX!!

3) Qus. : From where are you getting Goods?
Ans.: From other State/Abroad
Tax : PAY CENTRAL SALES TAX, CUSTOM DUTY & OCTROI!

4) Qus. : What are you getting in Selling Goods?
Ans. : Profit.
Tax : PAY INCOME TAX!

5) Qus. : Where you Manufacturing the Goods?
Ans. : Factory.
Tax : PAY EXCISE DUTY!

6) Qus. : Do you have Office / Warehouse/ Factory?
Ans. : Yes
Tax : PAY MUNICIPAL & FIRE TAX!

7) Qus. : Do you have Staff?
Ans. : Yes
Tax : PAY STAFF PROFESSIONAL TAX

8] Qus. : Doing business in Millions?
Ans : Yes
Tax : PAY TURNOVER TAX!

9) Qus. : Are you taking out over 50,000 Cash from Bank?
Ans. : Yes, for Salary.
Tax : PAY CASH HANDLING TAX!

10) Qus. : Where are you taking your client for Lunch & Dinner?
Ans. : Hotel
Tax : PAY FOOD & ENTERTAINMENT TAX!

11) Qus. : Are you going Out of Station for Business?
Ans. : Yes
Tax : PAY FRINGE BENEFIT TAX!

12) Qus. : Have you taken or given any Service/s?
Ans. : Yes
Tax : PAY SERVICE TAX!

13) Qus. : How come you got such a Big Amount?
Ans. : Gift on birthday.
Tax : PAY GIFT TAX!

14) Qus. : Do you have any Wealth?
Ans. : Yes
Tax : PAY WEALTH TAX!

15) Qus. : To reduce Tension, for entertainment, where are you going?
Ans. : Cinema or Resort.
Tax : PAY ENTERTAINMENT TAX!

16) Qus. : Have you purchased House?
Ans. : Yes
Tax : PAY STAMP DUTY & REGISTRATION FEE !

17) Qus. : How you Travel?
Ans. : Bus
Tax : PAY SURCHARGE!

18) Qus. : Any Additional Tax?
Ans. : Yes
Tax : PAY EDUCATIONAL, ADDITIONAL EDUCATIONAL & SURCHARGE ON ALL
THE CENTRAL GOVT.’s TAX !!!

19) Qus. : Delayed any time Paying Any Tax?
Ans. : Yes
Tax : PAY INTEREST & PENALTY!

After 48 years of marriage, an elderly Gujrati man in Bombay calls his son in New York and says, “I hate to ruin your day son, but I have to tell you that your mother and I are getting a divorce; 45 years of misery is enough!”

“Dad, what are you talking about?” the son screams.

“We can’t stand the sight of each other any longer,” the old man says. “We’re sick of each other, and I’m sick of talking about this, so you call your sister in Hong Kong and tell her!”

Frantic, the son calls his sister, who explodes on the phone. “Like heck they’re getting divorced,” she shouts, I’ll take care of this.”

She calls Bombay immediately, and screams at the old man, “You are not getting divorced. Don’t do a single thing until I get there. I’m calling my brother back, and we’ll both be there tomorrow. Until then, don’t do a thing, DO YOU HEAR??” and she hangs up.

The old man hangs up his phone and turns to his wife. “Okay”, he says,”It’s all set. They’re both coming for Diwali and paying their own airfare!!”

હુ અનેકને ચાહી શકું છું
અને એકની સાથે રહી શકું છું
હું એકની સાથ રહું
છતાંય અનેકને ચાહી શકું છું

હું કોઇકને સૂરજની હૂંફ આપી શકું છું
તો કોઇકને ચાંદનીનો ખોબો
હું કોઇકને વસંતની છાંયો આપી શકું છું
તો કોઇકને મસ્તમુલાયમ પવનનો ઝોકો,
હું કોઇકને ઝરણાનો કલરવ આપી શકું છું

તો કોઇકને પથ્થરનું મૌન
એવું નથી કે હું આપું જ છું
કોઇકને હુંફ આપું છું ત્યારે મને
સૂરજ મળતો હોય છે
ચાંદનીનો ખોબો આપું છું ત્યારે
મને ચંદ્ર મળતો હોય છે.

છાંયો આપું છું તો વૃક્ષ.
પણ હા, ક્યારેક એવું બને છે
કે હું સૂરજની હૂંફ આપું
અને કોઇક આખું આકાશ માગી બેસે તો
હું ચૂપ થઇ જાઉં છું
હું કલરવ આપું અને કોઇક ઝરણું માગી બેસે તો
હું થીજી જાઉં છું

હું પથ્થરનું મૌન આપું અને
કોઇક પહાડ માગી બેસે તો
હું મને જ સંભળાય એવી ચીસ પાડું છું
આમ છતાંયે
હું અનેકને ચાહી શકું છું
અને એકની સાથે રહી શકું છું

एक लडके को देखा तो ऐसा लगा..
जैसे भंवरे का रूप, जैसे सर्दीमें धूप
जैसे रेशमी चट्टान, जैसे प्यारकी उडान
जैसे बांहोमें बाग, जैसे पहेलूमें राग
जैसे सहरा में बरखा का मौसम आ गया

एक…

एक लडके को देखा तो ऐसा लगा..
जैसे महेफिलकी जान, जैसे शायरकी शान
जैसे जंगका एलान, जैसे गुंजती अझान
जैसे मीठा झहर, जैसे सुबहकी लहर
जैसे गोरे बदन पे बरसती काली घटा…
दो लफ्झोकी है दिलकी कहानी,
या है मुहोब्बत, या है जवानी !
एक लडके को देखा तो ऐसा लगा..
जैसे प्यारा सा गांव, जैसे झुल्फोंकी छांव
जैसे सपनों का रंग, जैसे वादियोंका संग
जैसे रातमेँ चिराग, जैसे जंगलमें बाग
जैसे धीरे धीरे फैलता हो ख्वाबका धुंवा…
एक लडके को देखा तो ऐसा लगा..

Aaj Tak gets news that 100 sardars are killed in a train accident at Amritsar station. Only one sardar left alive. The correspondent goes to him and asks, “Sardarji how did it
happen?”

Sardar: “Oh ji pucho mat. sab kuch sahi tha sab log platform par khade gaadi ki wait kar rahe they. Achanak announcement hui ki shatabdee express 2 no. platform par aa rahi hai. Jaise hi sab ne suna ki gaddi PLATFORM PAR aa rahi hai, sab log apni jaan bachane ke liye patri
par kood gaye. Aur tabhi gaddi patri par aa gayi.”

Aaj tak: “Thank god. Aap ne samajhdari dikhayee. Aap patri par nahin koode.”

Sardar: “oe nahin ji main to suicide karne ke liye patri par hi leta tha. Jaise hi announcement hui main to platform par chad gaya.”

HIMESH BHAI KE FANS AUR NON FANS SAB KE LIYE .DIL SE
HIMESH BHAI KE EK KHOOBSURAT GANE SE NIKALA HUA YE SHAYRI
TAREEF CHAHOONGA..JAROOR

Arz hai……….Zara Gaur Farmaiye

Tera Pyar Paana hain

Wah Wah

Gaur farmaiyega..

Tera Pyar Paana hain

Wah Wah ..kya baat hain

Aur Mera Pyar Nut-Bolt hain.. !!

Subhan allah..
Subhan allah!!

8 semesters are there

80GB syllabus

80MB we study

80KB we remember

80 Bytes we answer

BINARY marks we get,

The Degree finally we get is BE

That is Brain Empty (B.E)