Lady drinking COKE,
machchhar falls in.
Lady takes it out.
machchhar says “MAA”.
Lady asks why did u call me MAA.
Machar says
“Mai teri “COKE” se nikla hu MAA.
Page 42 of 134
To determine World’s most innovative companies, a survey is conducted by the Boston Consulting Group & BusinessWeek. More then 2,500 executive worldwide voted for the most pioneering companies doing business today. Apple and Google once again is on top. In this 2007 survey some new companies gain significient jump in their ranking compare to previous year, e.g. Walt Disney ranked No. 8 this time.(It was ranked 43rd in 2006) This is due to takeover of Pixar from Apple. Also Boeing rose to No. 21 (2006 Ranking No. 70) because of revolutionary jet plane 787 Dreamliner.
Honda Motors’s ranking also improved compare to last year(from 23rd in 2006 to 12th in 2007). Honda is known for fuel-efficient cars. Environmental approach and use of solar panels are major drivers of innovation at Honda.
Some companies ranking dropped little bit, like Dell and eBay. Dell is known for it’s efficient direct-to-customer model but it is struggling to adapt a shifting in computer market. Today retailing is growing at much faster rate and now Dell is going to adapt PC retailing also through partnership with Wal-Mart stores. eBay is pioneered in person-to-person e-commerce but growing competition from other companies slowed eBay’s growth. Though eBay bought Skype it still need to improve it’s business model to remain leader in online market.
This survey shows some interesting result. According to 2007 survey, just 46% of respondents (down from 52% last year) said they were satisfied with their return on innovation spending. Just 23% of respondents called it their top concern in this survey, down significantly from 32% last year.
The leaders of companies recognize that developing breakthrough products, revamping operational process and coming up with new business models doesn’t happen overnight. They are working to build organizations that are capable of sustained innovation and this requires taking risk and investing for the long term. They focus on the things that really matter, such as hiring the most talented employee and providing them with the environment that they need to thrive. Companies can make it really complicated or really simple.
Arthur D. Levinson, chairman of Genentech Inc. says that
If you want an innovative environment, hire innovative people, listen
to them tell you want they want,and do it
Source : BCG-Businessweek Special Report
Comments from Freerice Donor Relations Officer::
Yes, the Freerice.com website is an innovative initiative to raise funds for the purchase of rice for the world’s hungry. WFP is happy to have been selected as beneficiary of this creative idea.
Freerice.com is quite new and we were only recently asked to be the beneficiary. We are working on placing information on our own website to promote the initiative and to reassure people around the world who, like you, are enthusiastic about it, but cautious about participating in an activity that may not be what it claims. We expect to have initial information on our site within a couple of weeks.
In the meantime, we encourage you to spread the word. The site has become quite popular and every grain counts! So, indeed, play, polish up your vocabulary, and keep the donations coming!
Dear Banta
Vahe Guru !
I am in a well here and hoping you are in the same well there. I’m writing this letter slowly, because I know you cannot read fast.
We don’t live where we did when you left home. Your dad read in the newspaper that most accidents happen 20 miles from home, so we moved 20 miles.
I wont be able to send the address as the last Sardar who stayed here took the house numbers with them for their new house so they would not have to change their address. Hopefully by next week we will be able to bring our earlier address plate here, so that our address will remain same too.
This place is really nice. It even has a washing machine, situated right above the commode. I’m not sure it works. Last week I put in 3 shirts, pulled the chain and haven’t seen them since.
The weather here isn’t too bad. It rained only twice last week. The first time it rained for 3 days and second time for 4 days.
The coat you wanted me to send you, your Aunt said it would be a little too heavy to send in the mail with all the metal buttons, so we cut them off and put them in the pocket.
Your father has another job. He has 500 men under him. He is cutting the grass at the cemetery.
By the way I took Bahu to our club’s poolside. The manager is really badmash. He told her that two-piece swimming suit is not allowed in this club. We were confused as to which piece should we remove?
Your sister had a baby this morning. I haven’t found out whether it is a girl or a boy, so I don’t know whether you are an Aunt or Uncle.
Your uncle, Jetinder fell in a nearby well. Some men tried to pull him out, but he fought them off bravely and drowned. We cremated him and he burned for three days.
Your best friend, Balwinder, is no more. He died trying to fulfill his father’s last wishes. His father had wished to be buried at sea after he died. And your friend died while in the process of digging a grave for his father.
There isn’t much more news this time. Nothing much has happened.
P.S: Beta, I was going to send you some money but by the time I realized, I had already sealed off this letter.
UNIX is simple. But It just needs a genius to understand its simplicity.
–Dennis Ritchie
Before software can be reusable, it first has to be usable.
–Ralph Johnson
Good judgment comes from experience, and experience comes from bad judgment.
–Fred Brooks
It’s hard enough to find an error in your code when you’re looking for it;
It’s even harder when you’ve assumed your code is error-free.
–Steve McConnell Code Complete
The trouble with the world is that the stupid are sure and the intelligent are full of doubt.
–Bertrand Russell
If debugging is the process of removing bugs,
Then programming must be the process of putting them in.
–Edsger Dijkstra
You can either have software quality or you can have pointer arithmetic;
You cannot have both at the same time.
–Bertrand Meyer
There are two ways to write error-free programs; only the third works.
–Alan J. Perlis
Measuring programming progress by lines of code is like measuring aircraft building progress by weight.
–Bill Gates
The first 90% of the code accounts for the first 90% of the development time.
The remaining 10% of the code accounts for the other 90% of the development time.
–Tom Cargill
Programmers are in a race with the Universe to create bigger and better idiot-proof programs.
The Universe is trying to create bigger and better idiots.
So far the Universe is winning.
–Anon
Theory is when you know something, but it doesn’t work.
Practice is when something works, but you don’t know why it works.
Programmers combine Theory and Practice: Nothing works and they don’t know why.
The Six Phases of a Project:
· Enthusiasm
· Disillusionment
· Panic
· Search for the Guilty
· Punishment of the Innocent
· Praise for non-participants
No matter how slick (efficient) the demo is in rehearsal,
When you do it in front of a live audience
The probability of a flawless presentation
Is inversely proportional to the number of people watching,
Raised to the power of the amount of money involved.
Q. Below is a 2 BY 2 matrix.
(remember jo jeeta wahi sikander song …)
[ pehla nasha pehla khumar , ???????? ]
[ ????????, ???????? ]
The element in the 1st row, 1st column is ‘pehla nasha pehla khumar’.
Can you tell me the values of other 3 elements of this matrix?
Forgot Arrays ?? try try….
Ans:
The complete matrix is as shown below:
[pehla nasha pehla khumar , pehla nasha dusara khumar]
[dusara nasha pehla khumar , dusara nasha dusara khumar ]
In Japan, a visiting card should be respected like a person
In Greece, give your business card to everyone you meet
In Hong Kong, avoid the colors blue and white in your presentation
In Bulgaria/Hungary: napkins on the table not on the lap
In Indonesia, never touch another person’s head
The Irish always toast their visitors, and consider refusal to drink a bit of an insult
Meals in Italy are generally unhurried, and can last up to four hours
When doing business in Iceland, it is considered bad form to discuss the weather
In Finland, an invitation to join your host in the sauna represents an honour
Czechs remove their shoes when entering a home and leave them in the entryway
In Bulgaria, ‘yes’ is indicated by shaking the head from side to side and ‘no’ is expressed with one or two nods
Australians generally don’t like to talk business during leisure hours, and they avoid making class distinction
Jim and Edna were both patients in a mental hospital. One day while they were walking past the hospital swimming pool, Jim suddenly jumped into the deep end. He sank to the bottom of the pool and stayed there. Edna promptly jumped in to save him. She swam to the bottom and pulled Jim out.
When the Head Nurse Director became aware of Edna’s heroic act, she immediately ordered her to be discharged from the hospital, as she now considered her to be mentally stable. When she went to tell Edna the news she said, “Edna, I have good news and bad news. The good news is you’re being discharged; since you were able to rationally respond to a crisis by jumping in and saving the life of another patient, I have concluded that your act displays that you have a sound mind. The bad news is, Jim, the patient you saved, hung himself in the
bathroom with his bathrobe belt right after you saved him. I am so sorry, but he’s dead…
.
.
.
.
.
.
Edna replied, “He didn’t hang himself, I put him there to dry. How soon can I go home???”
1. A FOOLish man tells a woman to STOP talking, but a WISE man tells her that she looks extremely BEAUTIFUL when her LIPS are CLOSED.
2. One GOOD way to REDUCE Alcohol consumption :
Before Marriage – Drink whenever you are SAD,
After Marriage – Drink whenever you are HAPPY
3. Three FASTEST means of Communication :
1. Tele-Phone
2. Tele-Vision
3. Tell to Woman
Need still FASTER – Tell her NOT to tell ANY ONE.
4. Love your friends not their sisters. Love your sisters not their friends.
5. A man got 2 wishes from GOD. He asked for the Best wine and Best Woman.
Next moment, he had the Best Wine and Mother Teresa next to him.
Moral : BE SPECIFIC
6. What is a BEST and WORST news you can hear at the SAME time ?
It is when your Girl Friend says YOU are the BEST KISSER among all your Friends.
7. Let us be generous like this : Four Ants are moving through a forest.
They see an ELEPHANT coming towards them. Ant 1 says : we should KILL him.
Ant 2 says : No, Let us break his Leg alone. Ant 3 says : No, we will just throw him away from our path.
Ant 4 says : No, we will LEAVE him because he is ALONE and we are FOUR.
8. If you do NOT have a Girl Friend – You are missing SOME thing in your life.
If you HAVE a Girl Friend – You are missing EVERY thing in your life.
9. Question : When do you CONGRATULATE someone for their MISTAKE.
Answer : On their MARRIAGE.
10. When your LIFE is in DARKNESS, PRAY GOD and ask him to free you from Darkness.
Even after you pray, if U R still in Darkness – Please PAY the ELECTRICITY BILL.
11. Why Government do NOT allow a Man to MARRY 2 Women.
Because per Constitution, you can NOT PUNISH TWICE for the same Mistake.
12. “A Ship is always safe at the shore – but that is NOT what it is built for” – Albert Einstein
A Man to God
Man:”Give me a bag full of money, a job and a vehicle full of girls”
God replies:”so it be, my son”
and then….
Made him a bus conductor of BMTC (Bangalore Metropolitan Transport
Corp.) Ladies special bus!
Moral: Requirement specification should be CLEAR-CUT :-):-):-) ………
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