Ye Meri Life Hai - Chirag Mehta

Be Good & Do Good!

Month: October 2008 (page 2 of 3)

Singh is King Contd.,

Boss: Where were you born?
Singh: Punjab..
Boss: which part?
Singh: Kya which part? Whole body born in Punjab.

2 Singh were fixing a bomb in a car.
Singh 1: What would you do if the bomb
explodes while fixing.
Singh 2: Dont worry, I have one more.

Singh: What is the name of your car?
Lady: I forgot the name, but is starts with “T”.
Singh: Oye Kamaal ki gaadi hai, Tea se start hoti hai. Hamaara gaadi petrol se start hoti hai.

Singh joined new job. 1st day he worked till late evening on the computer. Boss was happy and asked what you did till evening.
Singh: Keyboard alphabets were not in order, so I made it alright.

Museum Administrator: That’s a 500-year-old statue u’ve broken.
Banta: Thanks God! I thought it was a new one.

At the scene of an accident a man was crying: O God! I have lost my hand, oh!
Santa: Control yourself. Don’t cry. See that man. He has lost his head. Is he crying?

Banta: U cheated me.
Shopkeeper: No, I sold a good radio to u.
Banta: Radio label shows Made in Japan but radio says this is all India Radio!

NOW THE LAST TWO ULTIMATE:
In an interview, Interviewer: How does an electric motor run?
Santa: Dhhuuuurrrrrrrrrr. …..
Inteviewer shouts: Stop it.
Santa: Dhhuurrrr dhup dhup dhup…

Tourist: Whose skeleton is that?
Santa: Tipu’s skeleton.
Tourist: Who’s that smaller skeleton next to it?
Santa: That was Tipu’s skeleton when he was child

Irvine Robbins – I don’t want my employees stealing

Irvine Robbins – American innovator who changed the way ice-cream was sold

Irvine Robbins started with a single ice-cream parlour in Glendale, Calfornia, and with his brother-in-law, Burton Baskin, turned it into Baskin-Robbins, the world’s biggest ice-cream chain. Robbins, who has died aged 90, was an innovator in both business and ice-cream – part of Baskins-Robbins’ success was due to their being among the first franchised retailers. Robbins claimed his franchising model inspired Ray Kroc, to whom he passed it on while supplying milkshake blenders to Kroc’s hamburger stands, called McDonald’s.

But Robbins’ real genius lay in the marketing of ice-cream itself. More than just a food, ice-cream is the great comforter of American life, and Robbins helped turn it into a great indulgence. The explosion of Baskin-Robbins’ 31 exotic flavours killed postwar America’s traditional preoccupation with vanilla, chocolate, and strawberry once and for all. Robbins’ idea was to surprise customers with new flavours, and the idea grew into commemorative tastes

He graduated with a degree in political science from the University of Washington in 1939, returned to the family business and married Irma Gevurtz. He served in the army during the second world war and, after his discharge, cashed in an insurance policy he had received for his bar mitzvah, moved to Glendale and opened the Snowbird ice-cream store. Baskin, who had married Robbins’ sister, had run a clothing store in Chicago before the war, but after his discharge from the navy, followed Robbins, and opened his Burton’s Ice Cream in nearby Pasadena. Robbins’ father had advised against the brothers-in-law going into business together, lest they inhibit each other’s ideas.

But by 1948 there were five Snowbird stores, and three Burton’s, and the brothers-in-law decided to merge. With the merger came their 31st flavour, chocolate mint, which gave them one for every day of the month (vanilla, chocolate, and strawberry were never counted among the 31). It would also be three more than Howard Johnson’s, who famously offered 28. Within a year they were up to 43 stores, growing quickly after deciding to sell each store to its manager, what would come to be known as “franchising“. They renamed the company, with a coin-toss deciding that Baskin’s name would come first.

Soon they were out of the managing business, producing ice-cream at a factory in Burbank, concentrating on the standardised look of the stores and a constant churning of the flavours they sold. Overall, more than 1,000 flavours have filled the scoops of Baskin-Robbins stores, and employees have always been allowed to eat as much as they like, because, as Robbins said, “I don’t want my employees stealing.”

In 1967, the partners sold their business, by then some 500 stores, to United Fruit for $12m. The premium ice-cream business took off as baby-boomers reached adulthood. Within six months, Baskin had died, aged 54, of a heart attack. Robbins worked for the company until retiring in 1978. It is now owned by Dunkin’ Donuts, and boasts some 5,500 stores worldwide. Robbins was an ardent anglophile, and an unlikely supporter of Newcastle United, but his Grape Britain ice cream, perhaps fortunately, never left the laboratory.

Robbins retired to Rancho Mirage, his house equipped with a six-seat soda fountain, where he ate three or four scoops daily, frequently adding banana ice cream to his breakfast cereal.

He is survived by Irma, daughters Marsha and Erin, and son John, who rejected the family business, became a vegan, and is the author of Diet for a New America.

Irvine Robbins, businessman, born December 6 1917; died May 5 2008

Ack :- Guardian.co.uk

Is India’s strong enough to weather the storm in the world financial market

The global economic crisis has come to India. Share markets are down; industrial production is down and the mood among businesses and investors is down.

The Prime Minister, Finance Minister and the RBI Governor have repeated said India’s economy strong enough to weather the storm in the world financial market and it’s banks have enough money.“The fundamentals of the Indian economy have been strong and continue to be strong. The Indian banking system is sound, well capitalised and well regulated,” said RBI Governor D Subbarao yet again on Friday night.

Is India’s strong enough to weather the storm in the world financial market? Is your money safe? A CNN-IBN show hosted by Karma Paljor discussed this on Friday with CNBC-TV18’s Banking Editor Latha Venkatesh, leading market expert S P Tulsian, who is the CEO of www.sptulsian.com, and Rajiv Bajaj, MD of Bajaj Capital.

Is your money safe ?

If a bank goes bust

Delhi resident Deven Mehta wanted to know what would happen to his money in savings account if his bank were declared bankrupt? “Is it true that the amount of Rs 1,00,000 is insured in the savings account of any bank?” he asked.

“Yes, an amount of Rs 1,00,000 is insured for every depositor. The rules of Indian commercial banks are such that they render depositors safe,” said Venkatesh.

“For every Rs 100 a bank collects as deposit, Rs 25 will have to be kept with the government as bonds. Governments cannot default, so Rs 25 is anyway safe. Another 8.5 per cent cash should be kept with the RBI, so that is safe again. Besides these there are other safeguards in the banking system.”

“Lehman Brothers lent 40 times its capital as loans and Goldman Sachs lent 27 times it capital but India is nowhere near that kind of cowboy lending,” said Venkatesh.

Safest bank?

As Indians feared for their deposits, the talk on the street was that public sector banks were safer. Is this true?

“Every institution should not be seen in the same light anymore. One should rate the credit-worthiness of an institution and even banks are subject to credit ratings. One should see the credit-worthiness of a bank and not whether it is public or private. I would keep my money in a Triple-A rated institution,” said Bajaj.

Should Indians withdraw their money from British banks? Is it the Indian government which guarantees savings in foreign banks?

Venkatesh’s advice was not to be scared, as the British government was doing its utmost to help its banks. “The British government has gone all out to reassure its banks in a big way. I assume that that assurance applies to branches in India. I think a scare (about British banks) is uncalled for. British banks is an umbrella term, one would have to refer to individual banks,” she said.

Staying invested

Bangalore resident Rakesh Kumar invested in the markets when the Sensex was at 20,000. “I can afford to remain invested for the next three years. Is my money safe or should I sell bearing a huge loss?” he asked.

Tulsian’s advice was: if you are an investor you must hold and if you are a trader you must sell. Now is a good time for people who have funds and are waiting to invest in shares.

Stocks of PSU banks, sugar stocks, pharmaceutical and FMCG companies look good for investment, he said.

It always the right time to invest—investors right now have to decide whether they want to preserve their money or use it to buy stocks which are normally unaffordable, said Bajaj.

“If I want to play safe I would probably put my money in gold mutual funds, which is a very good instrument to invest in this uncertain period,” said Bajaj.

Invest in equity funds and choose a large fund management house, which has lots off assets under management and a track record of at least 5-10 years. “Choose a large-cap and diversified fund. Whenever the market recovers, large and frontline companies will go up first, so invest in a large-cap fund,” said Bajaj.

Wait, watch and invest cautiously was the advice of the experts.

Excerpt From IBN Live.com

How to get rich despite bloodbath at markets

If there was one question that people would pay a million bucks to have the answer to, it would be – How do I get rich? The answer is really obvious – if you have a million to spare then why waste it on a foolish question.

Invest it and over the years you’ll surely get your millions.

But that’s not the answer they are looking for. Surely there has got to be something more to it — some deep insights, some invaluable pearls of wisdom, some magic!

Not really. It’s often just simple common sense. Like Robert Kiyosaki’s best selling book Rich Dad, Poor Dad that should be made the Bible of the financial world. Here are four points from there on how you can do it:

1. The value of learning

Go back to your earliest memory. When you wanted to ride a bike on your street, the first thing you had to do was learn how to ride. Or when you wanted to pass your Maths exam, you had to learn your tables. Then why is it that when we want to make money, do we not understand that we have to learn good investing?

Instead we tend to just pick up the phone, speak to our stockbroker, buy a stock and start dreaming of becoming rich. That’s exactly what rich investors don’t do.

Instead, they ‘learn’ to ‘invest’. They learn all there is to know about the art of investing in stocks. All about the stocks they wish to buy and only then do they take the plunge. Above all, they keep practicing what they have learnt. They keep sharpening their saw. This single factor of learning before hand separates the rich investors from the poor investors,

2. Shop at a discount

Another bit of common sense — What do you do when your neighborhood super market announces a SALE? You flock into the stores and buy up every little item and build up at home piles of grocery, soaps, etc. But when stock markets reduce the prices of shares and announce a ‘crash’ every investor rushes in to ‘sell’ and runs away from the market.

Again, conversely, when Super Markets raise their prices, customers shy away and refrain from buying till the next ‘sale’; but when Stock Markets announce rising prices, every investor rushes in to ‘buy’.

This is not the way rich investors behave. They follow the same principle of buying at the super market. They buy stocks only when the stock markets crash. Ask Warren Buffet!

3. Define asset

If you own it, it’s an asset. If you owe it, it’s not. The rich never keep their wealth in the form of liquid money in a bank account. They always keep acquiring assets while the poor acquire liabilities, which they mistakenly believe are their assets.

A house bought on a loan is not an asset, it’s a liability. The same goes for paying for groceries through credit card. So you need to learn the difference.

In life what is important is not how much money you ‘make’ but how much of that money you succeed in ‘keeping’ and ‘multiplying’.

The rich know how to keep it because they know how to invest it. Money well invested is money well kept. Good investing is often more rewarding than good earning.

4. Make real money

Real money is made when you ‘buy’ an asset and not when you sell that asset is yet another gem from the author. Be careful of the price you pay when investing in an asset.

Don’t rush into buying any investment at any price. Wait till the prices come down the way. The ‘price’ of the asset when you buy is the sole determinant of your profit on that asset when sold. If you buy that asset cheap, your profit on sale is obviously larger.

All these four seems rather straightforward now that you think about it. We known all this instinctively and we only have to apply it to the stock markets — it’s really common sense.

The only problem is that common sense isn’t really all that common.

Ack : IBN Live

Don’t get drunk on the stock price – Salesforce.com CEO Benioff

Source : CNBC

“Don’t get drunk on the stock price.”

That is Salesforce.com’s motto. Management uses it to keep the company focused on what matters most: satisfying customers rather than Wall Street.

“That is the only thing that matters,” CEO Marc Benioff told Cramer Tuesday.

Benioff said Salesforce is working with customers to find out exactly what they need in this tough environment. That, more than almost any other factor, is what drives business right now.

The goal is to impress upon customers that Salesforce’s “cloud computing” model is their best option. Forget big contracts with Microsoft , Oracle or SAP. Move past outdated hardware and software solutions. Benioff said his company’s “pay-as-you-go, elastic model” offers clients much more flexibility.

In fact, Benioff pointed out that Salesforce has nothing in common with a company like SAP. His stock was downgraded by a couple of analysts because they assumed Salesforce would slump just as SAP has, but that’s not the case. While SAP relies on large, “mega-transactions” each quarter, Benioff said, Salesforce’s on-demand model keeps revenues flowing.

Admittedly, even Benioff is playing it “more cautious and conservative than ever” given how hard the economy is right now. The company’s sitting on $823 million in cash and plans to do just that – sit on it – for the time being. Benioff said he’s more concerned with business fundamentals, which includes signing big customers and reaping the rewards over time.

“Some companies do well in tough times,” Cramer said. “This is one of them.”

Still, he thinks CRM is too high right now, and the market’s too tough. Cramer recommended waiting until the stock comes down before buying. And Salesforce is definitely worth a look when it does

Handle Salesforce Outbound Messages easily via Pervasive

by S. Patton, Technical Writer, Pervasive Software, Inc.

Salesforce offers outbound messaging so that you can monitor changes in your online CRM data. Once the SOAP message goes out, however, you’re on your own. Salesforce leaves it up to you to handle the message and channel it into something useful. Pervasive has done over 500 Salesforce implementations. Our customers wanted an easy way to handle those messages and turn them into emails or rows in a database, alter the format of the messages, pass them on to an ESB or otherwise turn them into useful data.

The new Salesforce Outbound Message Service is an add-on for version 9.2 of Pervasive Data Integrator that listens for and processes SOAP outbound messages from salesforce.com. When a message arrives from Salesforce, the service accepts the message and spawns a Pervasive Integration Engine instance. The message is then processed based on the specification file that you create with Map or Process Designer. Since Salesforce controls how messages are aggregated and sent, a single SOAP message may contain several notifications, all of which can be handled appropriately by a single specification file.

To use the Salesforce Outbound Message Service, you need to complete four steps:

  1. Set up outbound messaging and associated workflow rules in salesforce.com.
  2. Create a specification file to handle the incoming messages.
  3. Start the service container.
  4. Configure and deploy the Web service.

1. Set up outbound messaging and associated workflow rules in Salesforce.
Determine which fields and tables you wish to monitor in Salesforce. Specify workflow rules for when messages are triggered. For example, a message can be triggered each time a new lead is added, or when a specific contact name is changed. You’ll need to configure at least one workflow rule for each outbound message type. Information on how to set up workflow rules and outbound messages is located in the Salesforce online documentation.

2. Create a specification file to handle the incoming messages.
The specification file tells the service how to handle incoming messages. For example, you may want to save the message in its original format, format it to a specific standard, email it to others, etc. Your specification file can either be a simple process, or a .djar file. Any Pervasive process that does not contain any maps is fully specified in one XML file, and it can simply be uploaded to Salesforce as is. For processes with maps, .djar files can be created that contain all of the XML files for a full process compressed into one file. Since only one file can be uploaded to salesforce.com for each service you configure, upload a .djar file for processes with maps.

3. Start the service container.
Before you can access the Web service application, you need to start the service. On a Windows machine, Start/All Programs/Pervasive/SFDC Outbound Messaging Service/Start Service will get the service running. (Check the Pervasive documentation for Linux instructions.) To stop the service, select the same path to Stop Service.

4. Configure and deploy the Web service.
Log into the Web service application, configure and deploy your application, and you are ready to receive outbound messages. The Service Management Console is on the same Start path as the Start and Stop Service commands.

That’s really all there is to it, but here are a few helpful tips:

To see if a message is undelivered, log into salesforce.com, and click “View Message Delivery Status.”

To view the service log file, use the Start/All Programs/Pervasive/SFDC Outbound Messaging Service/View Service Container Log command on Windows, or open it directly with a text editor in the Pervasive installation directory\SFDC-OM\servicemix-3.2.1 on your server.

Modi gets Nano to drive from Gujarat

Within days of moving out of West Bengal, Tata Motors have decided to drive the Nano project to and from Gujarat. This development comes after Tata scouted many sites including some in Karnataka and Andhra Pradesh.

Tata Motors Chairman Ratan Tata and Gujarat Chief Minister Narendra Modi will make an announcement on Tuesday evening in a joint press conference.

Modi

The Tatas have chosen Sanand, close to Ahmedabad, as the project site. The site is located within the 2,200-acre Anand Agriculture University campus.

Sources say things are moving fast at the government front for the transfer of 1,000 acres of land to the Tatas.

Modi, who also completes seven years in office on Tuesday, will have a discussion with his Cabinet colleagues before finalising the deal.

Read Complete Story @ IBNLive.com

Lyrics of Aankh Hain Bhari Bhari Song

Following are lyrics of one of my favorite song from “Tumse Accha Kaun Hai” Movie …

Music By Nadeem-Shravan
Lyrics By Sameer
Performed by Alka Yagnik

Aankh Hain Bhari Bhari Aur Tum Muskurane Ki Baat Karte Ho
Aankh Hain Bhari Bhari Aur Tum Muskurane Ki Baat Karte Ho
Zindagi Khafa Khafa Aur Tum Dil Lagane Ki Baat Karthe Ho
Aankh Hain Bhari Bhari Aur Tum Muskurane Ki Baat Karte Ho

Mere Haalat Aisi Hai Ki Main Kuch Kar Nahin Sakta
Mere Haalat Aisi Hai Ki Main Kuch Kar Nahin Sakta
Tadapta Hai Yeh Dil Lekin Yeh Aahen Bhar Nahin Sakta
Zakhm Hai Hara Hara Aur Tum Chot Khaane Ki Baat Karte Ho
Zindagi Khafa Khafa Aur Tum Dil Lagane Ki Baat Karthe Ho
Aankh Hain Bhari Bhari Aur Tum Muskurane Ki Baat Karte Ho

Zamane Mein Bhala Kaise Mohabbat Log Karte Hai
Zamane Mein Bhala Kaise Mohabbat Log Karte Hai
Wafa Ke Naam Ki Ab To Shikayat Log Karte Hai
Aag Hai Buji Buji Aur Tum Lau Jalane Ki Baat Karte Ho
Zindagi Khafa Khafa Aur Tum Dil Lagane Ki Baat Karthe Ho
Aankh Hain Bhari Bhari Aur Tum Muskurane Ki Baat Karte Ho

Kabhi Jo Khwaab Dekha To Mili Parchiyaan Mujhko
Kabhi Jo Khwaab Dekha To Mili Parchiyaan Mujhko
Muhje Mehfil Ki Khwaaish Thi Mili Tanhaaiyan Mujhko
Har Taraf Dua Dua Aur Tum Aashiyaane Ki Baat Karthe Ho
Zindagi Khafa Khafa Aur Tum Dil Lagane Ki Baat Karthe Ho
Aankh Hain Bhari Bhari Aur Tum Muskurane Ki Baat Karte Ho

Is US a Bailout Nation ? List of Bailouts in US

What is Bailout ?
A situation in which a business, individual or government offers money to a failing business in order to prevent the consequences that arise from a business’s downfall. Bailouts can take the form of loans, bonds, stocks or cash. They may or may not require reimbursement.

Investopedia Says:
Bailouts have traditionally occurred in industries or businesses that may be perceived no longer being viable, or are just sustaining huge losses. Typically, these companies employ a large number of people, leading some people to believe that the economy would be unable sustain such a huge jump in unemployment if the business folded.

Following is the trail of BAILOUT(S) happening ever n than in US.

Bailouts in USUS Crisis

1932 — The Hoover administration creates the Reconstruction Finance Corp. to facilitate economic activity by lending money in the Great Depression.

1933 — The Roosevelt administration creates the Home Owners’ Loan Corp. to buy $3 billion in bad mortgages from banks and refinance them to homeowners to stem a rise in foreclosures. The government makes a small profit.

1971 — Congress saves Lockheed Aircraft Corp., the nation’s biggest defense contractor, from bankruptcy by guaranteeing the repayment of $250 million in bank loans.

1979 — Congress and the Carter administration arrange for $1.2 billion in subsidized loans to bail out automaker Chrysler Corp., then the nation’s 10th-largest company. There ultimately was no significant cost to the government, since the loans were repaid.

1984 — Congress effectively takes over the ailing Continental Illinois National Bank and Trust, which failed with $40 billion of assets. The Federal Deposit Insurance Corp. injects $4.5 billion to buy bad loans.

1989 — Congress establishes the Resolution Trust Corp. to take over bad assets and make depositors whole. Resolving the S&L crisis takes six years and $125 billion in taxpayer money — roughly equal to $200 billion in today’s dollars.

1998 — The government brokers a $3.6 billion private bailout in the collapse of the Long-Term Capital Management hedge fund, although no government money is involved.

2001 — Congress authorizes $5 billion in cash after the Sept. 11 terror attacks to help shore up the airline industry and follows up with $10 billion in loan guarantees.

2008:

March 16 — The Federal Reserve agrees to guarantee $29 billion of Bear Stearns’ assets in connection with the government-sponsored sale of the investment bank to JPMorgan Chase & Co.

July 11 — Federal regulators seize IndyMac Bank’s assets after the mortgage lender succumbs to the pressures of tighter credit, falling home prices and rising foreclosures. The Federal Deposit Insurance Corp. says it will cost about $8.9 billion out of its $53 billion insurance fund.

Sept. 7 — The Treasury Department seizes teetering mortgage finance institutions Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac, temporarily putting them in a government conservatorship with plans to inject up to $100 billion into each.

Sept. 16 — The government announces an $85 billion emergency loan to rescue American International Group Inc., the world’s largest insurance company, in return for a 79.9 percent stake in AIG.

Sept. 19 — The Bush administration announces a plan to let the government buy hundreds of billions of dollars of bad mortgages and other forms of toxic debt that have been weighing down U.S. financial companies.

Doesn’t this echoes US as Bailout Nation ?

Always Life doesn’t turn out the way we plan it

A woman was serving a life sentence in prison. Angry and resentful about her situation, she had decided that she would rather die than to live another year in prison.

Over the years she had become good friends with one of the prison caretakers. His job, among others, was to bury those prisoners who died in a graveyard just outside the prison walls. When a prisoner died, the caretaker rang a bell, which was heard by everyone. The caretaker then got the body and put it in a casket. Next, he entered his office to fill out the death certificate before returning to the casket to nail the lid shut. Finally, he put the casket on a wagon to take it to the graveyard and bury it.

Knowing this routine, the woman devised an escape plan and shared it with the caretaker. The next time the bell rang, the woman would leave her cell and sneak into the dark room where the coffins were kept. She would slip into the coffin with the dead body while the caretaker was filling out the death certificate. When the care-taker returned, he would nail the lid shut and take the coffin outside the prison with the woman in the coffin along with the dead body. He would then bury the coffin. The woman knew there would be enough air for her to breathe until later in the evening when the aretaker would return to the graveyard under the cover of darkness, dig up the coffin, open it, and set her free.

The caretaker was reluctant to go along with this plan, but since he and the woman had become good friends over the years, he agreed to do it.

The woman waited several weeks before someone in the prison died. She was asleep in her cell when she heard the death bell ring. She got up and slowly walked down the hallway. She was nearly caught a couple of times. Her heart was beating fast. She opened the door to the darkened room where the coffins were kept. Quietly in the dark, she found the coffin that contained the dead body, carefully climbed into the coffin and pulled the lid shut to wait for the caretaker to come and nail the lid shut.

Soon she heard footsteps and the pounding of the hammer and nails. Even though she was very uncomfortable in the coffin with the dead body, she knew that with each nail she was one step closer to freedom. The coffin was lifted onto the wagon and taken outside to the graveyard. She could feel the coffin being lowered into the ground. She didn’t make a sound as the coffin hit the bottom of the grave with a thud. Finally she heard the dirt dropping onto the top of the wooden coffin, and she knew that it was only a matter of time until she would be free at last. After several minutes of absolute silence, she began to laugh. She was free! She was free! Feeling curious, she decided to light a match to find out the identity of the dead prisoner beside her.

To her horror, she discovered that she was lying next to the dead caretaker.

Many people believe they have life all figured out….. but sometimes it just doesn’t turn out the way they planned it.

Think of a ‘Plan B’ !

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