Tag: Forwards (Page 31 of 48)

1. Don’t panic too often
2. Only write on one side of the paper
3. Be nice to librarians – esp in inter-library loans
4. Remember that your supervisor is a busy person – if he/she isn’t,
change your supervisor
5. Find out how you work best
6. Read your degree regulations
7. Always have a couple of things you can work on
8. Read some theses from your university in your area
9. Budget for typing and binding
10. Plan ahead

Read More @ Columbia.edu

1. The more beautiful the woman is who loves you, the easier it is to leave her with no hard feelings.

2. Nothing improves with age.

3. No matter how many times you’ve had it, if it’s offered take it, because it’ll never be quite the same again.

4. Sex has no calories.

5. Sex takes up the least amount of time and causes the most amount of trouble.

6. There is no remedy for sex but more sex.

Read More  @  Columbia.edu

1. Pay attention to your surroundings; you won’t spot good luck unless you look for it.

2. Strike up conversations with strangers. You might meet the love of your life or make an important business contact.

3. After you meet someone interesting, follow up with a note or phone call.

4. Stay relaxed, even in pressure situations; it’ll help you be more aware.

5. Vary your routine every day. Walk on the other side of the street or try a new lunch spot.

6. Be aggressive about making changes you want. Still thinking about moving across the country? Just go.

7. Follow your hunches and gut feelings; many seemingly random occurrences are actually the result of good subconscious decisions.

8. Treat nagging doubts as alarm bells; they’re often right, even if you can’t pinpoint the exact reason.

9. Expect good fortune; if you think something’s going to happen, you’ll be more likely to spot it when it does.

10. Believe in lucky charms. A rabbit’s foot doesn’t have special powers, but the confidence it gives you is very powerful.

11. Smile. People will smile back and suddenly you’re off to a good start.

12. Outlast bad luck; often a negative turn of events creates unexpected opportunities for good results.

Ack :- Jay Vora

Baat Din Ki Nahi, Ab Raat Se Dar Lagta Hai…
Ghar Hai Kacha Mera, Barsaat Se Dar Lagta Hai…

Tere Tohfay Ne To Bas Khoon Ke Aansoo Hi Diye…
Zindagi Ab Teri Saugaat Se Dar Lagta Hai…

Pyaar Ko Chod Ker Tum Aur Koi Baat Karo…
Ab Mujhay Pyaar Ki Har Baat Se Dar Lagta Hai…

Meri Khaatir Na Wo Badnaam Kahee Ho Jaae…
Iss Liye Unn Ki Mulaqaat Se Dar Lagta Hai…

Ack :- Anil jain

• The greatest handicap – Fear.

• The best day –Today.

• Hardest thing – To begin.

• Easiest thing to do – Finding faults.

• Most useless asset – Pride.

• Most useful asset – Humanity

• The greatest mistake – Giving up.

• The greatest stumbling block –Egotism.

• The greatest comfort – Work well done.

• Most disagreeable – Complainer.

• Worst bankruptcy – Loss of enthusiasm.

• Greatest need – Common sense.

• Meanest feeling – Regret at another’s success.

• Best gift – Forgiveness.

• The hardest and most painful thing to accept – Defeat.

• The worst moment – Death.

• The greatest knowledge – God.

• The greatest feeling – Love.

• The greatest success in the world –Self-fulfillment and peace of mind

Ack :- Divya bajpai..

Office me khush raho, ghar me khush raho
Zindagi hai choti, har pal me Khush raho…

Aaj Sahi Khana nahi hai, paneer me hi khush raho
Chapati nahi hai to kya, Rice me hi khush raho

Aaj gym jane ka samay nahi, Kaam me hi khush raho..
Aur kabhi kaam hi na ho to vyayaam me hi khush raho…

Aaj Dosto ka sath nahi, Tv dekh ke hi khush raho
Ghar ja nahi sakte to phone ker ke hi khush raho…

Sehwag ka shatak Door hai,1 darzan me hi khush raho
Aaj Cable kharab hai,Doordarshan me hi khush raho…

Aaj GF/BF gussa hai, uske is andaz me bhi khush raho
Jisse dekh nahi sakte uski awaz me hi khush raho…

IAF pilot banne ka socha tha, video game me hi khush raho,
Dawood to pakda nahi,fir Abu salem me hi khush raho…

Khushiyo ka intezar kyo,Gum me bhi khush raho
Laptop na mila to kya ,Desktop me hi khush raho…

Haste haste ye pal bitaenge, bita hua kal dukhi tha  
To kya hua, aane wale kal me khush raho

ek to zindagi hai, malal rekh ke kya kerenge,
ek zindagi, wo bhi chothi, har pal me khush raho…

Aur agar paka nahi sakte to kya hua pakne mein ki khush raho lekin bas khush raho………

Conclusion:  Happiness is the key to success.  If you remain happy in good as well as bad times,  then there is no stopping you from attracting the world towards you….remember,

A happy and smiling face is like a magnet which attracts each and every person towards you..

Ack :- Anand U Singh

1. Signboard outside a prostitute’s house: Married MEN not allowed.
We serve the needy, not the greedy…

2.Yesterday’s news : An aunty was raped while jogging.
Today’s news: More aunties found jogging.

3. How do Municipal Buses help in Family Planning?
By spreading the Message: KRIPYA PEECHHE SE CHADHIYE

4. Written on the T-Shirt of a girl:
SITUATORY WARNING: Objects inside the T-Shirt are larger than they appear from outside.

5. Hindi class mein master ki pant ki zip khul dekh Ladkiyan zor se hasnelagi.
Masterji bole : Zyada hehe ki to bahar nikaal kar khada kar doonga.

6. Santa was fondling a lady in a crowded bus.
Lady : Excuse me, aap achha nahi kar rahe hain!
Santa : Itni bheed mein is se achha nahi ho sakta.

7. Santa and banta were caught raping a girl. They were called for identification parade.
When the girl arrives, both Santa and Banta shout together: “Yahi thee,Yahi thee”

8. Judge : Why do u want divorce?
Banta : She doesn’t satisfy me in bed!
Preeto: Tu yaha ka collector laga hai? Sari colony khush hai, ik tumhari aag nahin bujhti.

9.Jeeto was going to Chandigarh for vacations.
At the time of packing Santa thinks: Kitni bholi hai, main saath nahin jaa raha phir bhi condom saath le jaa rahi hai.

10. Pappu meets papa Santa on stairs of a KOTHA.
Pappu: Papa aap yahan kya kar rahe ho?
Santa: Yaar ab 200-300 rupaye ke peeche teri mummy ke nakhre nahi sahe jaate!

11. Santa: Murge kaise diye?
Vendor: Rs 50, Rs 40 n Rs 10
Santa: Rs 10, itna sasta kyon?
Vendor: Sir ise AIDS hai.
Santa: De do mujhe to …. khana hai, g—d thodi m—- hai!

NO work load
NO work load

Apni to kaam-shala masti ki kaam-shala
apni to kaam-shala masti ki kaam-shala

na koi kaam karne wala
na koi appraisal pane wala

apni to kaam-shala masti ki kaam-shala
apni to kaam-shala masti ki kaam-shala

kaisa ye sannata hai…
kaam kyun nahi koi karta hai..
Charo aur machta Shor hai.
har koi kaam chor hai…

Continued in Comments

It was a hot meeting at the office conference hall. All the people from the department had been called. The VP was looking much tensed.

The mood was so bad. My friend asked me -“Hey, what is this meeting all about? I told – May be they will decide on when to have the next meeting. People around smiled at each other. Then the VP started talking. It was about the recent attrition rate that was so high. Around 10 people had put in their papers. All experienced guys. It was quarter end and so work was huge. If we do not complete the work on time, we need to be paying heavy penalty said the VP. The VP turned to the manager and told “Hey – take how much ever resources you want. Recruit or take them from other departments. But complete the work in another 25 days. Take people and complete it man.

To this the sweet manager replied “Sir! Give me one wife and nine months and I shall show you results. Don’t give me nine wives and one month. I cannot do anything.” Everyone looked at him blank.

The VP was not prepared for this answer. We looked at the manager and thought “What an Awesome Reply man!” 

Ack :- Melwyn Dsouza

· Have a firm handshake.

· Look people in the eye.

· Sing in the shower.

· Own a great stereo system.

· If in a fight, hit first and hit hard.

· Keep secrets.

· Never give up on anybody. Miracles happen everyday.