Girl : Aisa khat likh ke de sajna ve, Meri umar beet jaye padhte padhte
BoY : For(I = 1 ; i
Tag: Forwards (Page 39 of 48)
Tortoise and rabbit gave IIT exam and tortoise got 80% and rabbit got 81%.
Both wanted admission in a good engineering college, cut off was 85%.
Rabbit dint get but tortoise got…
U wanted to know How….
Ans: Remember tortoise had won the race when you were in first standard..
So.. Sports quota!!!!
About me: I think I am changing the world, but I am not. I think I am contributing to the Indian economy, but I guess I am not. I think I love my work, but I do not. I think I hate all people who made me earn my engineering degree, and I do. I think I am living, but and most importantly, I am LOOKING for someone!! Ok…I won’t be funny anymore. I am a cool guy with a zeal to enjoy life (If you know me–> “Just stop laughing!!”)
Relationship status: what?
Birthday: The day my PL is about to fire me
Age: 10111
Here for: web browsing in company hours
Children: can’t be (hey, don’t get me wrong here!!)
Ethnicity: Programmer
Languages I speak: Java, C/C++, 010101110101
Religion: I get holidays on all religious festivals, so I love all religions.
Political view: the guy sitting beside me is a pig!!
Humor: weekly
Sexual orientation: When will I have sex?
Fashion: Ask my company HR. Btw, I like jeans, t-shirt and a cross-bag.
Pets: Yeah, my PL looks like a dog.
Living: Cummon, this is a stupid one. How can this be asked to a software engineer? Believe me, I am living!!
Hometown: My company (Oh God! Please bring my appraiser to this page)
Webpage: http://naukri.com, http://jobsahead.com
Passions: cursing my company, looking for another company, remembering my good old college days,worrying about my future.
Sports: quake, CS (Counter Strike), computer chess
Activities: Are you crazy?
Books: “How to lose weight in 20 days?”, “How to live a happy life?”, “101 ways to attract a girl”, “Java Unleashed”, “C++ at your footsteps”, Others censored.
Music: Metallica, Pink Floyd, Nirvana, ACDC, and anything depressing.
Tv shows: can’t afford one
Cuisines: Bread Butter, Maggi, anything available within 200 metres of home.
These four classified ads appeared in a newspaper on four consecutive days. The last three hopelessly trying to correct the first day’s mistake…
MONDAY: For sale – Vishanth has a sewing machine for sale. Phone 98407 16581 after 7PM and ask for Mrs Mani who lives with him cheap.
TUESDAY: Notice: We regret having erred in Vishanth’s ad yesterday. It should have read, “One sewing machine for sale cheap. Phone 98407 16581 and ask for Mrs Mani, who lives with him after 7PM.”
WEDNESDAY: Notice: Vishanth has informed us that he has received several annoying telephone calls because of the error we made in the classified ad yesterday. The ad stands correct as follows: “For sale – Vishanth has a sewing machine for sale; Cheap. Phone 98407 16581 after 7PM and ask for Mrs. Mani who loves with him.
THURSDAY: Notice: I, Vishanth, have no sewing machine for sale. I smashed it. Don’t call 98407 16581 as I have had the phone disconnected. I have not been carrying on with Mrs. Mani. Until yesterday, she was my housekeeper but she quit!
CREATE PROCEDURE MyMarriage
@ BrideGroom Char(NotBad),
@Bride Char(Good)
AS
SELECT Bride FROM
Delhi Brides
WHERE
FatherInLaw = ‘Millionaire’ AND
CarCount > 2 AND
HouseStatus =’TwoStoreyed’ AND
BrideEduStatus=’PGorAbove’
HavingBrothers=’NO’ AND
HavingSisters =’No’ AND
AllowRelocate =’YES’ AND
SELECT Gold ,Cash,Car,BankBalance FROM FatherInLaw
UPDATE MyBankAccout SET MyBal = MyBal + FatherinLawBal
UPDATE MyLocker SET MyLockerContents = MyLockerContents + FatherinLawGold
INSERT INTO MyCarShed VALUES (‘Ford’)
Agar ek NAGIN ek NAG ko kiss karegee to NAG kaunsa gaana gayega
“Zeher hei kya pyaar hei tera chumma “
Ack:- Taslim Satya
Its binary James bond ! 🙂
Shame on the readers as u r TechSavy u shld know this
Boy was born to a couple after eleven years of marriage. They were a Loving couple and the boy was the gem of their eyes. When the boy was Around two years old, one morning the husband saw a medicine bottle Open.
He was late for office so he asked his wife to cap the bottle and keep It in the cupboard. His wife, preoccupied in the kitchen totally forgot The matter. The boy saw the bottle and playfully went to the bottle fascinated by Its colour and drank it all. It happened to be a poisonous medicine Meant for adults in small dosages. When the child collapsed the mother Hurried him to the hospital, where he died. The mother was stunned. She Was terrified how to face her husband.
When the distraught father came to the hospital and saw the dead child , He looked at his wife and uttered just five words.
QUESTIONS :
1. What were the five words?
2. What is the implication of this story ?
ANSWER :
The husband just said ” I am with you Darling “
The husband’s totally unexpected reaction is a proactive behaviour. The Child is dead. He can never be brought back to life. There is no point In finding fault with the mother. Besides, if only he had taken time to Keep the bottle away, this would not have happened.
No one is to be blamed. She had also lost her only child. What she Needed at that moment was consolation and sympathy from the husband. That is what he gave her.
If everyone can look at life with this kind of perspective, there would Be much fewer problems in the world. “ A journey of a thousand miles Begins with a single step. ” Take off all your envies, jealousies,Unforgiveness, selfishness, and fears. And you will find things are Actually not as difficult as you think.
MORAL OF THE STORY
Sometimes we spend time in asking who is responsible or whom to blame,Whether in a relationship, in a job or with the people we know. By this Way we miss out some warmth in human relationship.
A young man was getting ready to graduate college. For many months he had admired a beautiful sports car in a dealer’s showroom, and knowing his father could well afford it, he told him that was all he wanted.
As Graduation Day approached, the young man awaited signs that his father had purchased the car. Finally, on the morning of his graduation his father called him into his private study. His father told him how proud he was to have such a fine son, and told him how much he loved him. He handed his son a beautiful wrapped gift box.
Curious, but somewhat disappointed the young man opened the box and found a lovely, leather-bound Bible. Angrily, he raised his voice at his father and said, “With all your money you give me a Bible?” and stormed out of the house, leaving the holy book.
Many years passed and the young man was very successful in business. He had a beautiful home and wonderful family, but realized his father was very old, and thought perhaps he should go to him. He had not seen him since that graduation day. Before he could make arrangements, he received a telegram telling him his father had passed away, and willed all of his possessions to his son. He needed to come home immediately and take care things.
When he arrived at his father’s house, sudden sadness and regret filled his heart. He began to search his father’s important papers and saw the still new Bible, just as he had left it years ago. With tears, he opened the Bible and began to turn the pages. As he read those words, a car key dropped from an envelope taped behind the Bible. It had a tag with the dealer’s name, the same dealer who had the sports car he had desired. On the tag was the date of his graduation, and the words…PAID IN FULL.
How many times do we miss God’s blessings because they are not packaged as we expected?
Ack:- Sachindanand Mall
What is Bruce Lee’s favorite vegetable?
A. Mu Lee
What does Bruce Lee like to have for lunch ?
A. Tha Lee
What happens to the theatre once a Bruce Lee movie is over?
A. Kha Lee
What is Bruce Lee’s sister-in-law’s name?
A. Saa Lee
Bruce Lee’s favorite breakfast?
A. Id Lee
Bruce Lee’s favorite Music?
A. Qawa lee
Bruce Lee’s favorite festival?
A. Diwa Lee
Bruce Lee’s favorite Actress?
A. Sona lee
What is Bruce Lee’s most interesting job?
A. Coo Lee
What is Bruce Lee’s favourite hill station?
A. Kulu Mana Lee
How did Bruce Lee die?
A. With a Go Lee
Recent Comments