Ye Meri Life Hai - Chirag Mehta

Be Good & Do Good!

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Pro-Firefox Group Launches Mission To Destroy IE

Despite the vaunted rhetoric, the Firefox Four might be waging an uphill battle. A recent Forrester report on Web browsers found that Internet Explorer still dominates — by far. AOL follows IE in a distant second place, with Firefox, Opera, Safari, and other alternative browsers scrapping for what is left.

Styling themselves as political activists, a Massachusetts group has launched a concerted effort to inveigle Internet Explorer users to switch to the Firefox Web browser. The focal point of the movement is a site called ExplorerDestroyer.com.

In addition to talking up the strengths of Firefox, the site highlights a new Google AdSense program that offers $1 to online publishers for every referred netizen who downloads Firefox.

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Firing IT companies in India

1) IBM — Right now this is the most firing and dangerous company for IT professionals. From the last 6 months, this company fired nearly 20% of their employees because of BG check and performance issues. This is most unsecured company from IT professionals point of view. They didn’t have any strategic plans at HR policies regarding employee security.

2) Accenture — This is second top most firing company. This company was also have good firing rate like 15%. This is basically depends upon outsourcing, so there is no job security for an employee in this company.

3) Intel — Recently they started firing of the employees.

4) CTS — Always having firing policies(checking the Educational background and previous employment and also employee performance in work)

5) CSC — Basically not a firing, but be careful about Back ground.

6) Satyam — Basing upon their projects requirement they used to fire the people. Currently they stopped firing. Attrition rate is very high.

7) Patni —- They fired so many employees, currently they are in very mcuh deficiency withe employees. Attrition rate is very high in this company. Not attractive package. So take care before accepting offers from this company.

8) Rsystem —- Work pressure is too much sometimes may be beyond limits. Attrition rate is average. They fired 10% in 2005.

How True Is Your Love

Are your palms sweaty, is your heart racing and is your voice caught within your chest??
-It isn’t love, it’s LIKE.

You can’t keep your eyes or hands off of her, am I right??
-It isn’t love, it’s LUST.

Are you proud, and eager to show her off??
-It isn’t love, it’s LUCK.

Do you want her because you know she’s there??

-It isn’t love, it’s LONELINESS.

Are you with her because it’s what everyone wants??

-It isn’t love, it’s LOYALTY.

Are you with her because she kissed you, or held your hand?
-It isn’t love, it’s LOW CONFIDENCE.

Do you stay for her confessions of love, because you don’t want to hurt her?
-It isn’t love, it’s PITY.

Do you belong to her because the sight of her makes your heart skip a beat??
-It isn’t love, it’s INFATUATION.

Do you pardon her faults because you care about her?
-It isn’t love, it’s FRIENDSHIP.

Do you tell her every day she is the only one you think of?
-It isn’t love, it’s a LIE.

Are you willing to give up all of your favorite things for her sake?
-It isn’t love, it’s CHARITY.

Does your heart ache and breaks when she’s sad?
-Then it’s LOVE.

Do you cry for her pain, even when she’s strong?
-Then it’s LOVE.

Do her eyes see your true heart, and touch your soul so deeply it hurts?
-Then it’s LOVE.

Do you stay because a blinding, incomprehensible mix of pain and relation pulls you close and holds you to her?
-Then it’s LOVE.

Do you accept her faults because it’s a part of who she is?
-Then it’s LOVE.

Are you attracted to others, but stay with her faithfully without regret??
-Then it’s LOVE.

Would you give her your heart, your life, your death??
-Then it’s LOVE.

Now, if love is painful, and tortures us so, why do we love?
Why is it all we search for in life? This pain, this agony?

Why is it all we long for? This torture, this powerful death of self?
Why?
The answer is so simple cause it’s…LOVE.

It is such an addictive thing that even people who are not having it wish to experience it and share it with others as well.

Gujju Jokes

Why did the Gujjus think the man who acted as Gandhi in the film was a woman? – Because his name was ‘Ben’ Kingsley.

Why does the Gujju go to London? – To see his Big Ben.

Why did the visitor to the Gujju home run away when he was offered tea? – Because the Gujju said he would serve snakes with it.(snacks)

What is a Gujju picnic called? – A snake in the grass

Why did the Gujju wear a Tuxedo to his vasectomy?
If he was going to become impotent, he wanted to look impotent. (important)

Why did the American get scared of the Gujju? – Because he said ‘Sue kare chhe.’

Why did Bill Clinton have the Gujju beaten? – The Gujju told him, You are an impotent man.

What will a Gujju tell a tomato who is trailing in a vegetable race? – Come on, Tomato, Ketch up

What did the Gujju mean when he said, Maro dikro STATES ma gayon? – His son failed in statistics.

Maro dikro Dubai gayo? – My son drowned.

Why was the Gujju stacking up pennies on the day before exams? – He wanted to get cent-par-cent.

Why did the gujju go to Rome ?
He wanted to listen to POPE music.

What did the Gujju have in the morning?
LIGHT SNAKES for breakfast.

What did the Gujju say to the singing prostitute?
You are going from BED To VERSE.

Why won’t the gujju jeweler sell anything to the UP ka bhayiya?
The bhayiya kept giving gujju a bunch of hair each time the gujju asked for KESH.

21st Century……Less ..Less..Less

21st Century…

Our communication – Wireless

Our dress – Topless

Our telephone – Cordless

Our cooking – Fireless

Our youth – Jobless

Our food – Fatless

Our labour – Effortless

Our conduct – Worthless

Our relation – Loveless

Our attitude – Careless

Our feelings – Heartless

Our politics – Shameless

Our education – Valueless

Our follies – Countless

Our arguments – Baseless

Our boss – Brainless

Our Job – Thankless

Our Salary – Very less

SOFTWARE PROFESSIONAL HUSBAND

Ack:~ Jothi

HUSBAND – HAI DEAR, I AM LOGGED IN.

WIFE – HAVE YOU BROUGHT THE SAREE.
HUSBAND – BAD COMMAND OR FILE NAME

WIFE – BUT I TOLD YOU ABOUT IT IN MORNING
HUSBAND – ERRONEOUS SYNTAX, ABORT, RETRY, CANCEL.

WIFE – HAE BHAGWAN! FORGET IT WHERE’S YOUR SALARY.
HUSBAND – FILE IN USE, READ ONLY, TRY AFTER SOME TIME

WIFE – AT LEAST GIVE ME YOUR CREDIT CARD, I CAN DO SOME SHOPPING.
HUSBAND – SHARING VIOLATION, ACCESS DENIED

WIFE – I MADE A MISTAKE IN MARRING YOU.
HUSBAND – DATA TYPE MISMATCH

WIFE – YOU ARE USELESS.
HUSBAND – BY DEFAULT

WIFE – WHO WAS THERE WITH YOU IN THE CAR THIS MORNING
HUSBAND – SYSTEM UNSTABLE, PRESS WHEN U R ANGRY FOR 1 MINUTE U LOSE 60 SECONDS OF HAPPINESS!

MunnaBhai M.C.A.

appun jaise tappori s/w Engg. ko kya maalum…
saala programming kis chidiya kaa naam hai…
template me subclassing karke apanaa timepass hota hai….
copy paste kaa kaam miltaa hai bass appun khush…!!!
fir yeh coding kaa lafdaa locha kaiko?
are kaiko ?
arre kaiko re?
fir ek din boleto appun ko project mila…..
ya haaaaaaaaaa!!!!
saala appun ka khopdi chakkar kha gaya …
computer ke saath dil saala takkar kha gayaa…!!!
appun ko lagaa appun kaa beda paar ho gaya…
boleto baap saala appun ko bhi kaam mil gaya…!!!
din bhar appun computer ke aagge…
koi lafdaa nahi kuch nahi…
tin din naa Raghu se raada na Abbhi se pangaa
bass choop chaap…
appun kaa bhidulog saala dar gaya…
bola kya be manya saala tu bhi programmer bann gaya…!!!
phir ek din appun ko kaam kartaa dekh vikya bola…
ye munnabhai kya coding bana rela hai baap…!!!
vikya ko pakdaa… bola idhar aa shahane tereko coding seekhataa hai… saale ko itnaa dhoyaa itnaa dhoyaa… abhi tak thobdaa waakadaa hai … aur aaj tak uska forms ke saath chattis kaa aakdaa hai…!!!
samzaa …?
samzaa…?
samzaaa naa…?
(fir …? fir kya huwa..?)
fir ek din appun ne coding poora kar diya…
form poora karke appun ne testing ko bhej diya…!!!
lagataa tha ab appun kaa kaam khatam ho gaya…!!!
par DTS me issues dekhake sala appun darr gaya…!!!
appun ke saamne tester ne mere coding me ki galtiyaa nikali… aapun ke coding ki poori waat laga di…. appun udharich khadaa thaa… par appun kuch nahi bola… kaiko bolega? kaiko…?
saala ek, ek kaam kiya thaa… usme bhi itne bugs…
par appun ek aansu nahi roya…
kaiko royega…?
kaiko..?
saala appunich yedaa thaa naa…!!!
agale din se phir wohi life chalu…
wohi gande mails forward karnaa, wohi messages, wohi template, wohi assignments… saala itnaa mails forward kiya…itnaa mails forward kiya… log samze mail server down hoyega… bhoolneka hai bhoolneka hai par kya karega…!!!
training milke bhi jab kaam nahi miltaa hai…
haa thoda bore huwa par chaltaa hai…
(phir …? phir kya huwa..?)
fir …?
fir kya…?
fir agale din appun ko aur ek project mila…!!!
shaappak…
saala appun ka khopdi phir chakkar kha gaya …
computer ke saath dil saala phir takkar kha gayaa…!!!

Friends, yeh hai zindagi……….. Life GOL GOL hai !!!!!!!!!!!!

Ack :~ PARUCHURI GOPIKRISHNA

Friends, yeh hai zindagi,
Requirements hai to design hai
Design hai to Development hai
Development hai to Testing hai

Testing hai to Defects hai
Defects hai to Fixing hai
Fixing hai to More Defects hai
Defects hai to Analysis hai

Analysis hai to Requirements hai
Requirements hai to Design hai
Design hai to Development hai
Matlab Project Gol Gol hai
Bus ghumaanewala chahiye..

Some thing similar to this………..
Zindagi Hai To Khwaab Hai
Khwaab Hai To Manzilein Hai
Manzilein Hai To Fasaley Hai
Fasaley Hai To Rastey Hai

Rastay Hai To Mushkilein Hai
Mushkilein Hai To Hausla Hai
Hausla Hai To Vishawas Hai
Vishvas hai to Paisa hai

Paisa hai to Shohrat hai
Shohrat hai to Izzat Hai
Izzat hai to Ladki hai
Ladki hai to Tension hai

Tension hai to Concern hai
Concern hai to a Khayaal hai
Khayaal hai to Khwaab hai
Khawab hai to Growth hai

Growth hai to Zindagi hai
Zindagi hai to khwaab hai
Matlab duniya Gol Gol hai
Bas ghumaanewala chahiye……

Company Offers Windows in Mac OS

While Apple has given its users an option to choose between Windows or Mac OS X at startup, other companies are working to give Mac users the ability to run Windows from directly within Apple’s operating system using virtual machine technology.

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Chennai emerges as best city for offshoring

Chennai has emerged as the most attractive city for offshoring, beating traditional top cities like Gurgaon, Faridabad, Noida or NCR, Bangalore and Mumbai. Hyderabad follows as a close second-most attractive city. Kolkata is emerging as a credible alternative to cities with more established offshoring services industries. These key findings were released by A.T. Kearney on Saturday, the global management consultancy firm in their Indian City Services Attractiveness Index 2005.

The cities have been benchmarked as attractive based on three major categories of financial costs (compensation costs, infrastructure costs, cost of living); people skills & availability (availability, educational skills & attrition rates); and the business environment (city infrastructure, quality of life and government support).

Chennai emerged as a clear leader across all categories followed by Hyderabad, NCR and Bangalore.

Nine Indian cities of Chennai, Hyderabad, NCR, Bangalore, Mumbai, Kolkata, Pune, Kochi and Jaipur were assessed for their attractiveness for placing offshoring services.

According to Mr Mohit Rana, principal, communication & technology practice, A. T. Kearney, Gurgaon, they see a “trend of vendors developing Tier 2 locations as the Tier 1 are expensive.” Mr Arjun Sethi, principal, BPO & offshoring, A. T. Kearney, New York, said, “The A. T. Kearney study as expected reflects that the Tier 2 cities have a significant cost advantage.

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