Story I
E: Do u have a boyfriend?
C: I have.
E: Is he working Locally?
C: No. He is working Overseas.
E: Sorry, my company cannot employ u !
C: Why?
E: U will not be able to settle down here permanently. And my Company don’t want to pay extra expenses on the Overseas calls just because of  u.

Story II
E: Any girl friends?
C: No.
E: So far chased any before?
C: Have, but not successful.
E: Ever think of getting a job first then start looking for a girlfriend?
C: Career is first priority. Currently didn’t want to consider This personal issue.
E: Sorry, my company cannot employ u.
C: Why?
E: You are lacking of P.R skills and confidence!!
Continue reading

Ack:- Ankit Jain

Watch the video of DON ..Its Yuppie

http://www.thebirthofdon.com/

Ack:- Taslim Satya

The person who formulated this sentence must be a vocabulary wizard. Read the sentence below carefully. .. .

“I do not know where family doctors acquired illegibly perplexing handwriting nevertheless, extraordinary pharmaceutical intellectuality counterbalancing indecipherability, transcendentalizes intercommunications incomprehensibleness. “

In this sentence the Nth word is N letters long. e. g. 3rd word is 3 letters long, 8th word is 8 letters long and so on. .

Ack:- Arjav Patel

છું સૂરજ પણ રાતને ઊગતી તો દાબી ના શકું,
છો રમત મનગમતી હો, કંઈ રોજ ફાવી ના શકું.

ઈચ્છું છું જે કંઈ હું એ સઘળું તો તું દઈ ના શકે,
હું ય જે ઈચ્છું છું એ સઘળું તો માંગી ના શકું.

લાખ ઈચ્છા થાય તો પણ ચાલતા રહેવું પડે,
શ્વાસ છું તો આમ અધવચ્ચે હું થાકી ના શકું.

ફૂલ ને ખુશ્બુની પાસે આટલું શીખું તો બસ-
એ જ મારું છે હું જેને પાસે રાખી ના શકું.

લાખ ગમતો હો છતાં પણ વાતેવાતે રોજેરોજ
હું ગઝલના શેરને સઘળે તો ટાંકી ના શકું.

આ ગઝલ એથી લખી કે શ્વાસ તારા નામના
જો નથી મારા તો મારી પાસે રાખી ના શકું.

When I Take a long time to finish, I am slow,
When my boss takes a long time, he is thorough,

When I don’t do it, I am lazy,
When my boss does not do it, he is busy,

When I do something without being told, I am trying to be smart,
When my boss does the same, he takes the initiative,

When I please my boss, I am apple polishing,
When my boss pleases his boss, he is cooperating,

When I make a mistake, you’re an idiot.
When my boss makes a mistake, he’s only human.

When I am out of the office, I am wandering around.
When my boss is out of the office, he’s on business.

When I am on a day off sick, I am always sick.
When my boss is a day off sick, he must be very ill.

When I apply for leave, I must be going for an interview
When my boss applies for leave, it’s because he’s overworked

When I do good, my boss never remembers,
When I do wrong, he never forgets

1. On being Late

“Kab chalu hua?”

“Attendance ho gaya kya??”

“Kal raat der tak gappe marte rahe yaar”

“Mein kya karu, Kumar bathroom mein ghusa hua tha”

“Aab nind nahi khuli to mein kya karu……… bolna ……. kal kya padaya tha sir ne”

“Kal se pakka class karunga”

“Ek page de na………. abe pen bhi to de…….”

“Kal proxy mara tha kya”

“Yaar iss class ke liye koi subah kaise aa sakta hai……..”

1. You can stare at any Girl…….

2. You don’t have to spend money on her.

3. You won’t get boring result in ur board papers.

4. No girlfriend, no emotional blackmailing.

5. If u don’t have a girlfriend, she can’t dump u.

6. Having a girlfriend is hot, not having a girlfriend is automatically cool, and every one loves to be a cool guy.

7. This can be more to life than just waiting for the bloody phone to ring.

8. You won’t have to tolerate someone else defining, “right” and “wrong” for u.

9. Girlfriend can get so possessive that you can’t do anything according ur wishes anymore.

10. You can buy gifts for mom, dad, sis or grandpa instead of a girlfriend and have a happier family  life.

11. You won’t have to waste paper writing love letters.  No more endless waiting for ur date to arrive at some weird shop place.

12. You can have more friends, as u will have more time for them.

13. You wont have to see boring love stories instead of sports.

14. You wont have to tell lie to anybody and,  therefore, u’ll sin less.

15. You can have good night’s sleep-no need to dream about her.

16. You wont have to fight over having a ‘special’ friend with ur folks.

17. No nonstop nonsense.

18. You wont have drown in the pool of her tears.

19. No tension.

20. You can be “urself”

21. You wont have to hide your telephone bills…..

Ack: – Saurabh Rawane

When a guy calls you,
he wants to be with you

When a guy is quiet,
He’s listening to you…

When a guy is not arguing,
He realizes he’s wrong

When a guy says, “I’m fine, ” after a few minutes,he means it

When a guy stares at you,
he wishes you would care about him and wonders if you do

When you’re laying your head on a guy’s chest,
he has the world

When a guy calls you everyday,
he is in love

When a (good) guy tells you he loves you,
he means it

When a guy says he can’t live without you,
he’s with you till your done

When a guy says, “I miss you, ”
he misses you more than you could have ever missed him or anything else

Ack :- Saurabh Rawane

When a girl bumps into your arm
while walking she wants you to hold her hand

When she wants a hug
she will just stand there

When u break a girls heart,
she still feels it when u run into each other 3 years later

When a girl is quiet,
millions of things are running through her mind.

When a girl is not arguing,
she is thinking deeply.

When a girl looks at you with eyes full of questions,
she is wondering how long you will be around.

When a girl answers, “I’m fine, ” after a few seconds,
she is not at all fine.

When a girl stares at you,
she is wondering why you are so wonderful.

When a girl lays her head on your chest,
she is wishing for you to be hers forever.

When a girl says that she can’t live without you,
she has made up her mind that you are her future.

When a girl says, “I miss you, ”
no one in this world can miss you more than that

When a girl is mean to you after a breakup
she wants you back, but she’s scared she’ll get hurt and knows you’re gone forever

Ack :- Jay Vora

આશાઓ પર પાણી ફરી જતાં વાર નથી લાગતી
કિનારે આવી ડૂબી જતાં વાર નથી લાગતી

જીતનો જલસો માનવાની ઉતાવળ ન કર
જીતેલી બાજી હારી જવામાં વાર નથી લાગતી

તારી ઊંચાઇનું નાહક અભિમાન ન કર
કે મિનારોને તૂટી જવામાં વાર નથી લાગતી

બાંધ્યો છે માળો તો જરા દિલથી જતન કર
કે માળાને પીંખાઇ જતાં વાર નથી લાગતી

માણી લે હર એક પળ તું આજે
આંખોને મિંચાઇ જતાં વાર નથી લાગતી