Drag your mouse to move GEorge Bush accordingly u want

Keep your office clean… stay home!!!

Be quiet in the office…
…respect the fact that others sleep!

When you get this E MAIL, send it to 1 person u love, 1 u hate, 1 u always
think of and 1 u wish to kill. Now, keep guessing why I sent it to u.

The IDEAL man does not smoke, does not drink, does not flirt, goes to bed
early, in short … does not exist

Sometime my mind asks why I miss you? Why I care for you? Why I remember
you? Then my heart answers it’s simply because mental patient needs more
care.

Like energy, love can neither be created nor destroyed. It can just be
transferred from one girlfriend to another girl friend.

And the final one…

Great people talk about ideas, average people talk about things, small
people talk about others… But legends never talk, they send E MAIL.

A taxi passenger tapped the driver on the shoulder to ask him a question.

The driver screamed, lost control of the car, nearly hit a bus, went up on the footpath, and stopped centimeters from a shop window.

For a second everything went quiet in the cab, and then the driver said:
“Look mate, don’t ever do that again. You scared the daylights out of me! ”

The passenger apologized and said,
“I didn’t realize that a little tap would scare you so much.”

The driver replied, “Sorry, it’s not really your fault. Today is my first
day as a cab driver I’ve been driving a van carrying dead bodies for the last 25 years !!!”

Ack : ~ Manoj Patel

SELECT happiness, prosperity FROM life WHERE year >= 2006 ;

UPDATE life SET failure_flag = “NO” , success_flag = “YES”;
INSERT INTO life VALUES (“friends”,”dreams”) ;
DELETE sorrows FROM life;
GRANT smile TO all ;
REVOKE enemity FROM all;
ALTER TABLE life ADD dreams CHAR(INFINITY);

Ack : ~ Hussain Ladha

Brahma
Systems Installation

Vishnu
Systems Administration & Support

Lakshmi
Finance and Accounts consultant

Saraswati
Training and Knowledge Management

Shiva
DBA (Crash Specialist)

Ganesh
Quality Assuarance & Documentation

Narada
Data transfer

Yama
Reorganization & Downsizing Consultant

Chitragupta
IDP & Personal Records

Apsaras
Downloadable Viruses

Devas
Mainframe Programmers

Surya
Solaris Administrator

Rakshasas
In house Hackers

Ravan
Internet Explorer WWWF

Kumbhakarnan
Zombie Process

Lakshman
Support Software and Backup

Hanuman
Linux/s390

Vaali
MS Windows

Sugreeva
DOS

Jatayu
Firewall

Dronacharya
System Programmer

Vishwamitra
Sr. Manager Projects

Shakuni
Annual appraisal & Promotion

Valmiki
Technical Writer (Ramayana Sign off document)

Krishna
SDLC ( Sudarshan Wheel Development Life Cycle )

Dharmaraj Yudhishthira
ISO Consultant (CMM level 5)

Arjun
Lead Programmer (all companies are vying for him)

Abhimanyu
Trainee Programmer

Draupadi
Motivation & Team building

Bhima
MAINFRAME LEGACY SYSTEM

Duryodhana
Microsoft product Written in VB

Karna
Contract programmer

Dhrutarashtra
Visual C++

Gandhari
Dreamweaver

100 Kauravas
Microsoft Service Packs and patches

Ack : ~ Ram Kumar Chandak

If you find yourself in love with someone who does not love you, be gentle with yourself. There is nothing wrong with you. Love just didn’t choose to rest in the other person’s heart.

If you find someone else in love with you and you don’t love him/her, feel honored that love came and called at your door, but gently refuse the gift you cannot return, do not take advantage, do not cause pain.

How you deal with love is how you deal with you, and all our hearts feel the same pains and joys, even if our lives and ways are different.

If you fall in love with another, and he/she falls in love with you, and then love chooses to leave, do not try to reclaim it or to assess blame, let it go. There is a reason and there is a meaning. You will know in time .

Remember that you don’t choose love. Love chooses you. All you can really do is accept it for all its mystery when it comes into your life. Feel the way it fills you to overflowing, then reach out and give it away.

Give it back to the person who brought it alive in you. Give it to others who deem it poor in spirit. Give it to the world around you in anyway you can. There is where many lovers go wrong. Having been so long without love, they understand love only as a need. They see their hearts as empty places that will be filled by love, and they begin to look at love as something that flows to them rather than from them.

The first blush of new love is filled to overflowing, but as their love cools, they revert to seeing their love as need. They cease to be someone who generates love and instead become someone who seeks love.

They forget that the secret of love is that it is a gift, and that it can be made to grow only by giving it away.

Remember this, and keep it to your heart. Love has its own time, its own seasons, and its own reason for coming and going. You cannot bribe it or coerce it, or reason it into saying. You can only embrace it when it arrives and give it away when it comes to you. But if it chooses to leave from your heart or from the heart of your lover, there is nothing you can do and there is nothing you should do.

Love always has been and always will be a mystery. Be glad that it came to live for a moment in your life.

Ack :~ Nikhil Patel
Ant : Haathi tumhari umar kitni hai?

Elephant: Paanch Saal !!!

Ant : Paanch Saal aur itnay bade !!!

Elephant: I AM A COMPLAN BOY .

Elephant: Cheenti tumhari umar kitni hai ?

Ant: Tees Saal.

Elephant: Tees Saal aur itni chhoti.

Ant: Haan …. I AM A SANTOOR GIRL…. MERI TWACHA SEY MERI UMAR KA PATA HI NAHI CHALTA !